Dr Fap
Dr. Fap is a bizarre villain. He considers himself a practicing "adult baby" who torments his underling with cruel rituals like "Gape the Turd Glove" and "Baby Diaper Mustache". In place of his right hand is a yellow rubber fist that he uses to masturbate. Dr. Fap is one of the true puppet masters behind Def and his whores (the other being Dagon). He sent Def to destroy the Church of Fatherless Time, but soon realized that he would have to do it himself after seeing Def’s continued failures. Many of Fap’s plans have been foiled by the Bishops bringing more butthurt than Julio reaming Def’s cornhole. Dr. Fap sits on his ass all day moderating the website Mental Ward Rehab. He only leaves his computer desk to eat, sleep and change his diaper. __TOC__ Early Life Fap began his life as a farm boy nicknamed “Jerky”. His true name is never revealed, only that he is from England and had a reputation for bullying in the kids in the poverty-stricken region where he lived. He had a reputation as a “shit-for-brains, lard-ass” who loved beef jerky, earning him his nickname. Fear of Donkeys While visiting his uncle’s farm, Jerky was kicked in the forehead by a donkey when he tried to put his finger into the donkey’s anus after the animal defecated. This made his eyes go cross and created a soft spot on his forehead. From this he developed a fear of donkeys. Stupid Motherfucking Racist Bullshit Jerky lost his right hand during a hate crime that went horribly wrong. He and two of his friends targeted a black kid named "Rock", whom they kidnapped at gunpoint and took to a remote area where they threatened to wrap a chain around his neck and drag him down the road. Once Rock was untied and realized that Jerky was trying to scare him with an air pistol, a fight ensued. Jerky wrapped the chain around his hand like a cestus to sneak up on Rock. The other end of the chain was tied to the bumper of a truck. One of Jerky’s friends, who just got beat up by Rock, jumped into the truck and sped off. Jerky was yanked to the ground; the links of metal around his hand unwound and spun about his flesh with such tremendous velocity that it acted as a chainsaw chain that lopped of his right hand. Eesh. Flight to America and First Mod Job Now a cock-eyed amputee destined for perpetual bullying, Jerky moved from England to start a new life in the United States. He became a moderator for an Internet café located at the Shore. When the original site owner stepped down, she handed over the reins to Jerky and he took the whole operation underground. Webmaster of the Ward The Ward became a breeding ground for trolls, flamers, hackers, deviants, and STDs. A few members who left the Ward got wise to Fap's bullshit and joined the Church of Fatherless Time with Masked Bastard. The remaining Denizens continued to kiss Fap's ass. Rightly Deserved Death Dr. Fap met his end at the hands of the unmasked Arch Bishop. After seeing the Bastard's true face, his head exploded into a pile of cranial crap. EPIC WIN.